Monday, November 03, 2008

Where God wants me to be.. I'll go!

Well, Abraham must have said it, and I believe countless prophets and great men and women of God, the missionaries of God's Kingdom must've said it too! It's painful, it's dreadful, and in many ways a sheer agony to utter those words (as I've realise recently), but well, aren't God's ways higher than our ways? And besides, didn't He promise those of us priviledged to be called His Sons and Daughters that He'll never leave us nor forsake us?

Oh yeah, but still, I can't help those terrible thoughts in my mind... those horror stories about Johor.. ARRRGGGHH!

Frankly, I'd be a hyprocrite if I said I'm not too worried about my posting to Johor. It really wasn't something I was looking forward to, since I'd just made that tiring move from Sarawak to Selangor. But still, some things just cannot be changed. Yeah, I was quite dissapointed when my appeal letter to the MOE to be re-posted back to Selangor was rejected. But I guess, God's hand was behind it all...

Just the night before the news concerning the results of my appeal came, God very specifically spoke into my heart that I was to go to Johor- He had a great plan for me there, and that it was to be my mission field for the next few years. And I kept being reminded about the faith Abraham had, as well as his obedience to God, first when He was asked to move away from his homeland and later, when he obediently heeded God's command to sacrifice his son Isaac and passed God's test of faith. So, when the call came from KPM the next morning, I was ready to face the news (dissapointed, but still ready)- and as expected, my appeal was rejected. I had to go to Johor.

Yeah, I've cried a lot thinking and agonizing about this. But I know it's just God's way of testing my faith. I've been going thru many things lately, which I realise now was God's way of preparing me for my new phase of life in Johor- shaping a more Christlike character within me cos no longer can I be that fearful, sensitive, spoilt, overly-emotional and at times irresponsible and immature person that I was before. I had tasted God's goodness and well, it's time to change... time to rise up to the calling God has set upon my life.. TIME TO MOVE ON!!

So, move on I will... just pray with me, people! =)

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